[RE] Great Essay

After listening to Adam Redfield read his UC statement like a really brave warrior. I was amazed. Literally I was speechless. It was great and it made me wonder. When he said,

To suddenly be self-aware, to mentally realize that I've been living the "ignorance is bliss" lifestyle truly upset me. My hunger for knowledge of the how and why grew insatiable.

That really started me. I saw what he was explaining to the reader. His point made me think of my iPod and phone. Like how are we able to adapt to them so quickly with out ever wondering how it works. It is like breathing in an interestingly smelly area with out even wondering if it could be harmful to our lungs. Also when he stated,

I feel the drive to create a computer or program so mind boggling that it will, in itself, inspire a whole new generation to ask the questions, how and why.

this is like saying that he wants to be one of those ingenious computer scientists that made some mind bobbling programs like the ones on futuristic movies. Thinking of all this makes me say that he really wants to make something of himself in this world. Someone that will create big things and improve the way we see and go about in the world with.  

Even thought this Essay makes me see all this all I sstill see 2 problems to deal with. The main one is about the issues with connecting it being something that college needs to be apart of. He talks a lot about being a computer scientist however this essay is for a college admission person to read and see if this person is a good match for thier school. He needs to add more about how school can help him learn what he cannot learn from anywhere else. Also the second problem is about going off track where he talks about him used to want to become a therapist. That is good to know but still there is no point in telling them this. It makes them think that he is not really set on what he wants to study in life. Over all it is very good. Great job! That is all I want to say about this.